Thursday, September 09, 2004

Bend over and take it...

Well, now that I have your attention, I'd like for all of you to first excuse the incredibly crass language that is about to spew from my fingertips. Then, I want all of you who:

a) don't live on a penninsula;

b) actually are responsible adults and take care of things before the last minute;

c) who don't live in a flood plain - or let's be honest here, a SWAMP!;

d) actually live somewhere that the threat of imminent (and continual the last few weeks) ruin by mother nature is not present; or

e) live somewhere that people do not wait six hours in line at HOME DELAY (i.e. Home Depot) to get plywood that you pay $34/sheet for ...

to pat yourself on the back. For you are far smarter than me. I actually (and yes, this is no laughing matter) attempted to get renter's insurance today. Seeing as we managed Frances relatively unscathed, I thought perhaps our luck was running out and we should seriously try to protect our meager beginnings as a married couple with protection over at least a small sum of insurance, considering that our house contains ALL OF OUR EARTHLY POSSESSIONS. However, I am convinced that the insurance companies are largely stocked by people whose sole mission in life is to make sure that you understand what a complete and utter fool you are to even imagine that you are going to get renter's insurance when there is a hurricane so close.

Yes. I am a fool. But it was worth a shot. And yes, they actually did laugh at me. Out loud. On the phone. And I felt like an idiot. Yes, that's right NINE of them did. Our insurance policy - yep. you guessed it... bending over and taking it. No foreplay, no lubricant. Just bend over and grab your ankles.

We're officially fucked. And no. they didn't want to cuddle afterward.


At 8:09 PM, Blogger Toni said...

WOW. You've got balls woman! I think I would have just thrown all of my stuff in a car and left. Plain and simple. Screw the insurance - we're going to need the money for food and gas.

I don't know how you are able to do it. PLEASE be careful with Ivan...I've heard he's terrible (hehehehehe)

At 12:44 AM, Blogger Dee said...

Sugarblossom--sorry to hear about your dealings with the insurance baddies! Unfortunately, you've revealed a quiet truth about getting any type of insurance (renter's, homeowner's, and maybe even auto) in Florida during hurricane season and with an active storm in the Caribbean basin--they won't bind coverage at all; do not pass go, do not collect $200.

Once Ivan gets the hell away from our recently squatted upon coastline and the friggin' season quiets down with the effin' storms, try again. You'll have success then. It's just that they won't do anything within something like a ten-day or so radius of impending doom. Bastards. (Oh, and if it's any help, we used Allstate for our renter's insurance a few years back; no real complaints to speak of even after we had a $20K+ flood loss and we didn't get dropped b/c of it. I know what you're wondering--no, that was not a hurricane-related flood loss, more like washing machine delivered while we weren't home, delivery men turned it on to test it and left while it was running--and while we were out of town on a long three-day weekend--it got stuck on the fill cycle for three whole days.)

Like I said in a previous post, glad you weathered the storm okay. This sucks, though, huh?


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