Woolen unitards and animal instincts

Hope is a funny bitch eh? Not one of us want to welcome her into our lives on our own accord, but it's amazingly comforting when there are others who are wishing her on you.

So thank you. yous guys? yous girls? you women? you womyn? I would say thank y'all as I was brought up to say, but that just makes me think of Brintey Spe*ars which in turn makes me feel itchy. Sort of like wearing a woolen unitard. And taken from someone who's horribly allergic to wool, well - that would be really itchy. Damn, I'm breaking out into hives just thinking about it.

Nonetheless, a sincere thank you from the bottom of my shriveled up little bitter barren heart.

CD 21, 8 days past IUI. I went in this morning to have my progesterone levels tested. Given that I'm on 400 mg. a day of prometrium I have no idea what effect that will have on the test, or honestly what it matters.

Michael is convinced that I'm up the duff. He's fascinated with my boobs - and more than once I've caught him staring at them in amazement. While I would normally like the attention (I married an "ass" man, and well, apparently the good Lord decided to smack me in the rear with a 2x4 so instead of a nice round tush I have a nice wide flat space back there. Clear Channel may be leasing me out soon) the thought of him touching them is a big giant nono. I can't even shower facing the water right now they're so sore.

This is kinda strange, and I've never heard of it before, but he can usually tell when I'm about to start my period, about a day and a half before by how I smell when I first wake up. He says it's a very faint sort of a metallic chemically smell. Yesterday he asked me if I had implantation spotting - and I laughed and said "uh - no and where the hell did that come from?" He said "are you sure?" I confirmed that there was definitely nothing there. I was cramping badly - to the point that I thought my period may start gushing at any minute, but there was no blood.

This morning when I woke up he rolled over nuzzled into my hair and then looked at me and said I smelled strange. I got pissed and got up to go get in the shower thinking maybe it was smoky residue from the place we ate dinner at last night - and he said "no - not stinky... just different somehow. Your scent is "off" and has been for two days now."

My husband thinks he's a bloodhound. And my cats who normally have nothing to do with me have decided that they are now lap cats, and need to sleep on top of me. They hiss at anyone who comes close and they've been pulling my dirty clothes out of the hamper and sleeping in them. It's very bizarre. Not quite as bizarre as this show I remember watching in elementary school about spaceships and science and Russian invaders (yeah, that's about all I remember - but the cast all wore bitchin' metallic braided shoelace headbands) but still - pretty weird.

The doctor's office is having me come in for a beta Wed. morning.

In the meantime, I'm trying to convince Deputy Dawg and the guard cats that I'm just fine and that all this attention is for naught.